Monday, May 27, 2013

Things I've learned from my Boyfriend

Steve got me this shirt....It's my favorite

Here's a closer look. Women always compliment me on this shirt.
In honor of my one year anniversary wiff my Boo, I wanted to impart all the things I've learned over this past year with him....Let's go back in time....actually, more like 10 months ago...*enter '80s dream Harp music*

Before we went on our first date, we text (constantly) and called each other for about a month and a half. Obviously, you get to know someone very well by then so I was aware of his healthy diet and strong fitness background. I was a hot mess. Well, what I thought was healthy really wasn't but of course, I had convinced myself that because I THOUGHT I was healthy it was going to magically matriculate into healthy habits. If that sounds convoluted, it's because IT IS! 

If I can't hear you tell me I'm not healthy, it's not true. FACT. 

Steve planned our entire first date. Our first stop was a small diner that had breakfast food served all day. My effing favorite because who doesn't love pancakes at all hours of the day? The devil. that's who. Anywho, I took a peek at the menu and set my eyes on something I knew was sent from the heaven's above, The Ultimate Platter. It was basically a platter for Champions like myself. It consisted of 2 eggs, sausage, homestyle potatoes, bacon, and a short order of pancakes the size of Shaq's face. Oh yeah....oh shiz, should I pretend to eat healthy here? Nah, it's a date, we're supposed to eat desserts and strawberries and decadent sexy stuff, right? (bacon's sexy. Don't question me.) He asks me what I'm having and I tell him my about my pork dream platter. "The Ultimate sounds pretty good!" Steve assured. When the waiter came around, he took my order and Steve ordered his, "I'll have the steamed salmon with 2 egg whites, 2 bacon and a side of fresh fruit." 

I knew it when I heard it. I was Bamboozled. He did the ol' switcheroo on me. Tryna Ack better than me! Oh Hellz no! All of the sudden I was offended! I thought to myself, 'Why didn't he order what I ordered? Didn't he know that was going to make me feel uncomfortable?' then it hit me. This guy wasn't here to impressed me, he was just going to be himself.      I. was. impressed.    For the first time, I realized I was being insecure and wanted him to validate my bad habits through excuses I thought were socially permissible.    I still had to question just to make sure this wasn't a facade. "Why didn't you order The Ultimate." Steve: "I don't eat that stuff."  *GASP!*     !!SHOCK!     !!AWE!!!!    *A kitten being thrown into bath water!* (I'm trying to paint the drama of the situation)     So, hold up, hold up, hold up...You don't EAT that stuff? That doesn't make sense. That's not even science. We were on a first date. Does that mean nothing to him? Then, another revelation... 'Why the hell would it?! It's a friggin' date, not his last meal.' I knew I would learn a lot from him just on that first date. It's been a year now and I'd like to bestow on you some wisdom that might be your paradigm. 

1) Don't let people around you dictate what you eat. 
This was hard for me to understand. As women, we're naturally nurturing. We want everyone to feel comfortable and not be a bother to anyone. Who wants to be the wet blanket ordering grilled chicken breast with a side of steamed vegetables on a double date? no one. Steve's train of thought "who gives crap what they think, it's my food going into my body!" He is so much right! No one else but me is going to feel the effects of a greasy burger with double cheese and chilli fries. For what? so THEY don't feel uncomfortable eating garbage? That's just their insecurities disguised as common courtesy. 

Not my problem, Bish!

2) You can really eat anywhere. really. 
This was my second trap. Every time we went out, I would argue, "You should pick. You're the one that eats healthy!" and he would always assure me that it was fine, he can really eat anywhere. I wasn't until I noticed that no matter where we went, crappy diner, hole in the wall restaurant, Pork Palace, he would modify a semi decent dish into a healthy meal....ANYWHERE. At first it was like magic, then I caught on. Oh, no cheese. Two sides of veggies, please. Just chicken breast, no sauce. Water, always. No apps, no 'sserts (parks and rec reference for you boring folks.) The modifications weren't outrageous either, it's not like he had the waiter ask the chef if the bean sprouts were Organic and fair trade. So seriously, after a year of eating out A LOT, we haven't found a place where we couldn't eat within our Paleo lifestyle. 

3) Stop being spoiled by food. 
Back when I was a tot, my gangster ass mom would cook different meals every night. Slaving over a hot kitchen making meals from scratch. For some reason, it never occurred to me that I could have "simple dinners" (as Steve referred it to, I called it boring) several times a week...and even at RESTAURANTS! The Horror! Fish and veggies?! at Red Lobster?! NO CHEESE BISCUITS? Why are we even calling ourselves American!? This was mind blowing...until I realized that we weren't paying people for a fine dining experience, we were paying for the convenience of someone making food we were too lazy to make. So many times I feel like I should order what my gut heart yearns for because this is special! I'm out with my boyfriend on a date....until of course, you realize you go out several times a week. Reevaluate what you consider special....just like your mom did with you. HA! jk

4) Push yourself every time you work out.... Hard. from the back. 
There were days I'd go out for a 3 mile jog and come back looking like a fresh daisy, take a shower and be done with my "workout". When Steve works out, if he's not sweating like a Miami hooker on night shift, he's not done with his workout. Since he introduced me to Crossfit, there hasn't been a workout where I didn't sweat through every piece of clothing on me and halfway through a cold shower. If you know you don't have the ability to push yourself like you need to, I strongly suggest Crossfit. Not only do the classes provide you with confidence and excellent training, they teach you to program workouts for yourself when you're not around a box (Crossfit gym). 

Overall, I've learned so much more but these were the ones that really hit it home for me. I'm so grateful for his patience with my subborness, his kindness, and his love. He has never been frustrated with my slow progression or berated me into fitness like so many other guys have tried. He's everything I've ever looked for, not just in a partner but a person. He has made me a better person in a way I never thought was possible. 

Steve, I love you so much. Happy Anniversary. 

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